Pretoria, South Africa – In a groundbreaking personal development, local man Peter Johnson has decided to stop blaming others for his misfortunes and has instead turned his ire towards his furniture. This revolutionary approach, inspired by his newfound interest in Feng Shui, has brought a unique twist to the age-old blame game.

Peter, a 35-year-old accountant, had always found it easier to point fingers at his colleagues, friends, and even the weather for his life’s challenges. However, after attending a weekend Feng Shui workshop, he had an epiphany: it wasn’t the people around him causing his problems, but rather the arrangement of his living room.

“I realized that my couch was directly in the path of negative energy,” Peter explained, gesturing towards the offending piece of furniture. “Every time I sat there, I felt drained and unmotivated. It was like the couch was conspiring against me.”

Determined to take control of his destiny, Peter embarked on a mission to rearrange his entire apartment according to Feng Shui principles. His first target? The coffee table, which he accused of blocking the flow of positive energy and causing his frequent stubbed toes.

“I used to blame my clumsiness on my genes,” Peter admitted. “But now I see that it was the coffee table all along. It’s been sabotaging me for years.”

Peter’s friends and family have been both amused and bewildered by his new approach. His mother, Margaret, recounted a recent visit where Peter blamed his bookshelf for his lack of career advancement. “He said the books were too close to the floor, which was keeping him grounded in mediocrity,” she said, shaking her head. “I’ve never heard anything like it.”

Despite the skepticism, Peter remains steadfast in his belief that his furniture is the root of all his problems. He has even started a blog, “Sofa, So Good,” where he documents his journey and offers tips on how others can identify and blame their own furniture for life’s woes.

“People need to understand that it’s not always their fault,” Peter wrote in a recent post. “Sometimes, it’s the chair you’re sitting on or the lamp that’s casting a shadow on your dreams.”

The blog has gained a modest following, with readers sharing their own stories of furniture-induced misfortune. One commenter, Jane, wrote about how her dining table was responsible for her failed relationships. “Every time we had a fight, it was at that table,” she lamented. “Now I eat on the couch, and my love life has never been better.”

Peter’s next project involves tackling his bedroom, where he believes his bed is the culprit behind his restless nights. “I’m convinced that if I move it to the other side of the room, I’ll finally get a good night’s sleep,” he said with determination.

As Peter continues to shift the blame from people to furniture, he hopes to inspire others to do the same. “It’s liberating,” he said. “Once you start blaming the furniture, you realize that life isn’t so bad after all. It’s just poorly arranged.”